Lost Bluebird
by Akirafanatic
Summary: Ran's thoughts 5-6 years after the take down of the BO.


**This idea refused to leave me alone. I'm not sure if I'll continue it or not, but for now it's a oneshot. I have at least 3 other ideas plaguing me for this fandom, not including continuing _6th Sense_. And for those who are unfamiliar with my typical writing, angst is what I mainly write. Not because I want to, but because _no matter what I write it always turns to angst_. Or at least has some angst-y element to it. I do admit that one of my stories I'm thinking about is a romance (probably either HakuShin or HakuKaiShin, maybe all four gosho boys if I feel like tearing Heiji away from Kazuha. Haven't decided yet) ANYWAY, enjoy the story and let me know what you think!**

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Ran smiled slightly as Sonoko ranted over how much she missed KID. The white clad thief had announced two years ago at his heist that he was retiring. Nobody knew why, or where he went, or who he was. After that heist, he simply vanished. Sonoko and all the other die hard KID fans were upset, to say the least.

While most had moved on, Sonoko continued to bemoan the fact her beloved thief was gone each time her family came into possession of a new jewel. He uncle had even tried issuing more challenges to KID, but the thief never showed. Privately, Ran thought Makoto was pleased that his wife was no longer in danger of being swept off by Kaitou KID.

The brunette quieted her chatter as the noise of the city began to fall away, until the two were left walking in silence. It was rather surreal, the karate practitioner thought. The sun was shining, the weather was beautiful, and most people were outside enjoying their weekend. Yet despite this, Ran still felt a pang of sadness and guilt, keeping her from truly enjoying the day.

Today was Shinichi's birthday, and she hadn't seen him in a little over six years now. She still remembered the last time she'd talked with him. He'd told her the truth about Conan – explaining why he had lied to her for those two years – and apologized so many times she'd lost count. She'd let him talk until he was done before slapping him and telling him she never wanted to see him again.

When she'd calmed down long enough to think about it, she regretted saying those words. He'd been stupid for lying to her, and thinking she couldn't protect herself, but he'd always had her best interest in mind. Even as Conan, he'd done his upmost to protect her and her father. Everything he'd done was with her wellbeing in mind.

So after two months brooding and sorting out her feelings, she'd gone to apologize. It was only when Agasa had found her knocking on the door and calling Shinichi's name that she learned he was gone. Guilt had gnawed at her for the better part of a year after that. Hattori, Hakuba, and surprisingly to her Kuroba, who all knew about Conan, had assured her that it wasn't her fault. They, along with Aoko, Kazuha, and Sonoko had been a tremendous part it helping her past Shinichi's leaving.

Spotting the figures waiting for them up ahead, Ran held up a hand and waved slightly. "Ran-chan!" Kazuha called with a small smile. She had one arm wrapped around Hattori, the other holding a small basket.

Hakuba was standing a little away from the group, seemingly believing that the more space he put between him and a certain magician, the safer he'd be. It may have also had something to do with not wanting to be around the hot blooded Osakan.

Aoko was standing next to the blond and pointedly ignoring her childhood friend. Ran had never understood what had happened to cause the sudden rift between her and Kuroba, but the two had never made up completely after. Kuroba had his hands in his pockets and was standing on the other side of the Osakan couple. He was always quieter when Aoko was around. The two were civil enough to each other, but it would be hard pressed to call them friends.

Kudo Yusaku and his wife were standing behind the young adults, with Kuroba's mother nearby. The two had never really gotten over the fact their son was gone, and for a long time Yukiko hadn't even been able to look at the young Kuroba without crying. Ran had been the same way. After a few weeks, Kuroba had started to dye his hair a lighter brown and used some makeup to change his looks enough that it was much easier to tell the difference between him and Shinichi. It was only after two years he was able to stop taking such measures around them. Even then, it still sent a small pang through her when she looked at the magician.

Ran managed a small smile for the group. "It's been a while."

"Good ta see ya Nee-chan," Hattori offered. "Been doin' alright?"

Sonoko cut in before Ran could open her mouth. "Ran's pregnant!"

There was silence for a bit as Ran flushed a bright red, glaring at her friend. "Sonoko!"

"Congratulations!" Kazuha said happily, letting go of her fiancée's arm and wrapping it around her friend.

"Do you know if it's a boy or a girl yet?" Aoko asked. Ran shook her head.

"I only just found out last week. I'm not far enough along yet to tell."

"Congratulations." Ran swallowed slightly and bobbed her head in thanks to Yukiko. She'd grown up believing that the woman would become her mother-in-law, and still felt a little odd about being around her while married to someone else. Yukiko and Yusaku had let her know they didn't mind, but Ran still felt guilt swirl in her stomach each time she kissed her husband in their presence. She was lucky Eisuke understood her feelings, and she did love him. Each time she found herself feeling guilty, he would take her into his arms and remind her why she fell in love with him. Thanks to his love and support, along with the Kudo's reassurance that they were happy for her, her guilt got smaller. She doubted it would ever truly leave, but at least it was to the point it wouldn't get in the way of her happy life.

After everyone had taken turns to congratulate her, the group made their way into the cemetery and to the Kudo headstone. Yukiko smiled sadly as she placed a picture of Shinichi in front of it. It was one of the last ones taken before he'd been killed – two weeks before Ran made that fateful trip to try and apologize.

He'd been eighteen, and was smiling slightly while watching something off camera. That was before Ran had told him she never wanted to see him again. It was only after the small funeral – his parents and the police had kept his death a secret so it didn't turn into a media fiasco – that it had been explained to Ran what had happened.

Shinichi had told her the truth because he'd been worried he wouldn't get another chance to. The idiot had a plan in mind to take out some high ranking players in the organization that had turned him into Conan. Of course, being who he was, he didn't see the importance of informing anyone about his plan.

The worst part for Ran, was that Shinichi's plan had _worked_. Many of the key players had been taken into custody, and knowledge of the organization was brought to light. Unfortunately, it also painted a large red target on the blue eyed detectives back, which wound up getting him killed. If it hadn't worked, Ran could have been angry and told him how stupid he was, and not forgive him for running off and trying to save the day all by himself.

But it had worked. Shinichi's plan had let the FBI, CIA, and secret police finally take down the organization. Ran was still angry, and had still yelled that he was an idiot, but had also known that because his plan had worked, he'd saved a lot of people's lives. She couldn't stay mad at him, no matter how much she wanted to.

Gently placing the flowers in her hands down, she stared at the photo of her childhood friend and longtime crush. Swallowing slightly, she let a small smile slip at how happy he was in the photo. "Happy birthday Shinichi."

Stepping back, she let the others lay their flowers or gifts down. Everyone was quiet for a few moments as they sent their thoughts to the fallen detective. Hattori wrapped an arm around Kazuha and pulled her close, kissing her forehead. Aoko put a hand on Hakuba's shoulder and gave him a small smile. Out of everyone there, she'd known Shinichi the least.

Yusaku wrapped his arms around his wife and rubbed circles on her back, whispering softly to her. Sonoko linked hands with Ran, who gave her a grateful smile and squeezed back lightly in thanks. Seeing Kuroba standing alone, she reached out and touched his arm lightly. He looked up and smiled softly, momentarily putting his hand on hers before letting go.

' _I miss you Shinichi. We all do.'_


End file.
